How to Forgive with God’s Grace—Even When It’s Hard

Forgiveness Isn’t Fair—But Grace Is Greater

Let’s be honest, forgiveness can feel hard, even impossible sometimes. When someone wounds you deeply, the last thing you want to do is let go. The rage, the hurt, and even the anger make it impossible to move on. And yet, forgiveness is not about excusing the hurt. It’s about releasing it to God so it no longer controls you.

The good news? God never asks you to forgive in your own strength. He gives you grace to do what you can’t do alone.

Scripture Focus on Forgiveness:

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”— Colossians 3:13 (NIV)

This verse doesn’t just suggest forgiveness; it commands it. But it also gives the reason: "as the Lord forgave you." Grace isn’t just a gift we receive; it’s one we pass on. Sometimes we do not forgive because we feel better or because the person is deserving of it, but because it is a commandment.

Why Forgiveness Feels So Hard

We often confuse forgiveness with saying the offence didn’t matter. But forgiveness doesn’t minimise pain, it hands the pain to God. It’s a choice to stop drinking the poison of bitterness and let grace do the healing. It is a choice to let go and let God fight for you. Unforgiveness keeps us stuck. But grace opens the door to freedom.

Real-Life Story: A Daughter’s Choice to Forgive

A woman grew up with deep resentment toward her father, who abandoned the family when she was five. For years, she carried the weight of rejection and silence. But then, while studying the Parable of the Prodigal Son, something shifted. She realised that the same grace that welcomed the prodigal son was also offered to her father. Through tears, she chose to forgive, not because he earned it, but because God had freely forgiven her.

That decision didn’t fix everything, but it set her heart free.

Grace Empowers Forgiveness

God’s grace doesn’t just save—it strengthens. You may not feel ready to forgive, but you can ask God for grace to take the first step:

• Pray for the person

• Release the debt in your heart

• Ask God to help you see them through His eyes

Matthew 6:14 (NIV) – “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”

Conclusion: Forgiveness Isn’t a Feeling—It’s a Grace-Filled Decision

Forgiving someone doesn’t mean forgetting. It means trusting God with the justice. When you choose grace, you choose freedom.

Reflect:

Who do you need to forgive today, not because they deserve it, but because you’ve been shown unending grace?

Prayer:

Lord, I’m holding pain that feels too heavy to carry. Help me forgive as You forgave me. Give me the grace to release bitterness and make space for healing. In Jesus’ name, amen.